Twas the Night Before Christmas - In Longmont?

A Longmont Visit From St. Nicholas

'Twas the Night Before Christmas, and there was no doubt,
Half of Longmont was ready to close this year out,
The ballots were stacked in their piles, one by one,
In hopes that the recounts were finally done,

The lawsuits weren't settled, but the end could be seen,
And with luck, they'd be done by 2014,
And mama and I had just come back from State,
Saying "Next year they'll win it -- Big Blue will be great!"

When out on the lawn, there arose such a ruckus,
I looked out to see if Balloon Boy had struck us,
Or whether an airplane had crashed from the sky,
Thanks to prairie dogs lurking in ambush nearby.

I looked o'er ten inches of new-fallen snow,
As the wind brought the chill down to 20 below,
When what should my wond'ring eyes see with a squint,
But a miniature sleigh with no carbon footprint!

With a little old driver, all rumpled and tossed,
That had to be Santa -- and he sort of looked lost,
He buzzed past some coops as he pulled on the rein,
And the chickens kept cackling as he called out in vain,

"Help, dash it! Please answer! Can somebody fix this!
"My Wi-fi's gone out and I'm 'bout to deep-six us!
"I'm over construction and starting to stall!"
"Follow me!" I told Santa. "Quick, head for the mall!"

Like llamas that run from a big wildfire,
Santa's sleigh streaked on forward, as he fought to stay higher,
Along past the highway, St. Nicholas flew,
Knocking down 30 cones and a power box, too,

He somehow kept on 'til Twin Peaks came in sight,
And it looked just like heaven despite all the blight,
Some last-minute shoppers looked up at the sound,
As down the parking lot sleigh and all came with a bound!

He was dressed all in red, just like every depiction,
And a passerby stared, then pulled out a prescription.
"Better call my dispenser," he said in his shock,
"He's gotta grow more -- man, this stuff really rocks!"

A SWAT team pulled up as St. Nick left the sleigh,
(Just in case -- after all, it had been a slow day),
But he held up his hand, and a hush hit the throng,
"Just a few words," said Santa, "for I cannot stay long."

"As you know, I've been keeping a very long list,
"I know just what you like and what wouldn't be missed,
"I've brought presents and toys from one year to the next,
"But frankly, this year, Longmont has me perplexed."

"RTD wants to know if I'll bring FasTracks rails,
"Some reporters are asking for missing e-mails,
"I've got pleas for civility, calm and respect,
"All accomplished at once -- and without a blank check."

"But some Christmas gifts can't be provided by elves,
"If you want this done right, you must do it yourselves,
"That's your job," Santa said, as he walked to his sleigh.
"But I'll give my best wishes -- and a new Chik Fil A."

He took to the sky without waiting for clearance,
So ending his strange and amazing appearance,
But I heard him exclaim as he set the controls,
"Merry Christmas ... No, Rudolph! Look out for the poles!"

Scott Rochat from the Times-Call wrote this poem. Spectacular! I hope to do more joint projects like this in the future. I can't wait to see the published piece.

12 Days of Christmas - Longmont Style

I felt this was perfect to have Longmont's very own caroling prairie dogs bring this song to you.
I did have some help with this one. Now go around town signing the tune.
Thanks for reading.

Easter All Ready?

No it's not Easter yet. Let's survive Christmas first.

Easter promotional images for the Times-Call.

Christmas Elves!

Here are some promotional characters I did for the Times-Call.

A Holiday Cover

A cover illustration I did for the Denver Daily News.
It's for a holiday Guide.

Decaying Roads Outside Boulder County.

I wounder if any Boulder County employees have used any of these roads on company time?
I am sure they have added to the decay of the roads. Someone needs to fix them.

Welzig Heating & Air Christmas Images

Here are a couple more Welzig cartoons I did.

Welzig also sponsors the Beet of Longmont

Only in the Times-Call

Stonebridge Games Characters

Here are some characters I did for Stonebridge Games.

It's a great store for your gaming fix.

Family Reading the Times-Call

Here is a promotional piece I did for the Times-Call.

Nothing brings the family together like sharing the paper.

Congratulations Kody Lostroh!

It's not everyday that someone from Longmont does something as cool as this. He really should have a parade. Kody, you did Longmont proud!

The Nederland Frozen Dead Guy is Still Frozen!

Hold your tongue with your fingers and say "Yep, He's Still Frozen."
OK..., so I was the kid who got his tongue stuck to the flag pole. Wouldn't you see if he was still frozen this way. Morbid... yes, but funny.

Nutcracker Ballet Coloring Sheet - Longmont Symphony

Yeah...A Tea-Party!

This was published in the Winter 2009 Longmont Magazine.

Isn't it Fancy!

Longmont a Ski Resort?

Those power poles are HUGE! They stick out like a sore thumb. I would think they could at least paint them gray or blue to blend into the environment. Anyway... Enjoy the cartoon.

Happy Halloween Longmont!

Train horns are made to save lives. I would rather be annoyed by the noise, than to go to a funeral. BTW, I live right next to the tracks and a major intersection. It's not that bad.

Obama Wins the Heisman!?

This idea was given to me by a co-worker. Thanks TOP!

Balloon Boy!

This story was and is weird! As you know, I work at the Times-Call in Longmont, for a 2-3 hour of time, the whole floor basically stopped what they were doing to watch this story unfold. It was very exciting. There were people captivated by the balloon and the story of a missing 6 year old boy stuck inside. We all were praying and hoping for a safe and happy ending. The news people where tracking the flight pattern, our photographer was chasing it, our writers were getting all the facts. It was amazing! Then... the balloon lands and there is no boy inside...we all lost hope, for the boy surley had fallen to his death. It was a period of morning. The whole floor became silent. BUT NOOOOOO. It's a hoax! The boy is safe and sound. Don't get me wrong, I am glad he is safe. But this show was brought to us and produced by the Heene family. Perhaps they should have made a movie, not a news event.

Longmont, Your 2009 Ballots are comming.

Now's your chance! Get educated on the candidates. Make a informed decision. Change Longmont to be more the way you think it should be. Do your duty and VOTE!
Maybe then we can have chickens and prairie dogs live in peace and harmony right here in Longmont.

Spooky Furnace and Water Heater

Another water heater and furnace picture for Welzig. Happy Halloween!

Check them out for all your heating and water heater needs.

http://www.welzigmechanical.com/

The Solution To Longmont Raising Park Fees

The day the original cartoon was posted, city council changed the increase to only a dollar. So I made this adjustment to the cartoon. It can be seen here at the Times-Call website as well.

Why not charge admission to the city's parks. Just build a tall fence around the parks, ad barb wire, (You don't want any one to be able to enjoy them for free) and wala...problem solved. This way, only the people who use the parks will have to pay.

In a Haze over Marijuana Laws.

Now is the time to start taxing marijuana. Not just a little, but a lot. We could eliminate our nations debt in a matter of weeks. (ok a bit longer, but you get the idea.) Cartooning for the paper is a interesting venture. I can draw this, but showing a joint is not acceptable. Sometimes it's like finding a creative way to say the obvious. Since this is a blog, I can say what I wanted to draw. Perhaps all the people smoking the marijuana have killed all of their brain cells and are unable to understand the laws and regulations. "Dude, I don't get it" inhale "Get what?"
Thanks for reading.

Does Vance Brand Municipal Airport Need FAA Funding?

Who knew that prairie dogs can dig under fences? Uh..... Everyone!
In my head, I see a prairie dog chained to the fence that was made to keep them out holding a sign that says "Hell No We Wont Go!"

I wounder how does it feel to be out smarted by a rodent?

Thanks for reading.

Higher City Fees In Longmont!

The idea of this cartoon came from a letter written to the Times-Call. Originally drawn with a Porky pig type of head and a brown rock. Nobody likes to be edited, but in this case it works much better. The rock looks like a rock and I think the blank expression on the piggy bank fits.
When times are tough, raising fees is hard for everyone.
Thanks for reading.

Hatfields VS McCoys - Longmont

This idea was presented to me. I know nothing of the parties involved, I just drew the gag.
But fighting over civility is just plain funny to me.
Thanks for reading.

Beaufort, NC - A Cartoon Map

Here is the final version of what was sent to press. This has got to be one of the largest projects I have worked on in my "free" time. (What ever that is.) Next I will be animating it in flash. Much like the Longmont Map I did here. http://www.timescall.com/cartoon_map/
I will post it here when completed.
Thanks for reading.

Uhh... Is Something Burning?

On Monday, the sky was to red, it was beautiful, yet creepy.
On a gross note... Just think, we all have a little bit of California in us.
I hope they are able to get all the fires under control.

Streak Free Windows in Longmont - A Logo!

Here is a logo I did for Streak Free Windows in Longmont. Check out their site. They really love what they do.
http://www.streakfreewc.com/ Thanks Bryan!

I love the way the squeegee pops off the page as well as the name.
Thanks for reading

What? No cartoons?!

Sorry friends, August and September look slow on the cartoon front. I am in the middle of a cartoon map for Beaufort, NC. Most of my spare time is being spent on this project. I will continue to post cartoons, just at a much slower pace.

Take a look, Beaufort, NC looks like a cool place to hang out.
Thanks for reading.
Sam

Longmont, a nice QUIET city.

I was told that the skydivers do not go "blah blah blah" but "yahooooo" All I can say is "huh?"
On a related note, I originally was going to have "bang bang" from the proposed firing range just to add even more noise, but I was told to leave that out. I guess gunshots went to far.
Thanks for reading.

Welzig Heating and Air

I just got done doing the last 2 toons on the right for Welzig. Every once in a while I draw a cartoon that just make me smile and chuckle every time I look at it. The hot water heater on the right does just that to me. How about you? Pretty silly, yes, but darn fun to draw. Let Welzig Heating and Air in Longmont know what you think of their cartoons.
Thanks for reading.

Going Green with Envy

Going green makes sence. Have some fun with it. This is published in the Fall 09 Longmont Magazine. He reminds me of a very short Jolly Green Giant

Thanks for reading.

Mead High School Open, Road to it is not!

I can just picture all of the sad high school students being unable to get to school.

Thanks for reading.

Cash for Clunkers at the Demolition Derby?

I wonder if all the drivers in the demolition derby at the Boulder County Fair tried to trade in the cars for the cash for clunkers program. I mean they might as well have. Striping a car down and getting it prepared for the derby takes a lot of time and money. I can just see one of the beat up cars pulling into the dealership, smoking, wobbling and making a lot of noise. All of the sales peoples eyes wide open and mouths dropping to the floor.

Thanks for reading.

Noise Mufflers for Planes!

Those planes need noise mufflers. The complaints are too loud. Really, will mufflers stop the complaints? No, there are will always be people who will complain about them. Next they will say planes are blocking out the sun. You just can't make everyone happy.

Thanks for reading.

Color Carmella!

Inside Sunday's Times-Call is a coloring page for Carmella.

Get the official coloring sheet here.
www.timescall.com/boulder_fair/carmella.pdf

I will be at the Times-Call fair booth on the 5th from 10:00 to 1:00.

I can't wait to see how all the kids color this.

Pot Holes & Prairie Dogs

There has been so much negativity towards the poor little prairie dog. We need to pull together and help these poor plague infested vermin. We need to see them for the good that they could do. Let's not cast them away, but embrace there special abilities... or we could just shoot em. (seriously, don't shoot them)

Thanks for reading.

American Idol in Denver!

Can you believe the hype? So many people want to be the next big star. Are they really prepared for what it really is like? I originally thought of this gag with a single person alone downtown, but after sketching out the buildings, I thought it would be silly if the buildings missed all the people.

Thanks for reading.

Well, it looks like this edited version will run after all.

Thanks for reading.

Start Spraying For Mosquitoes All Ready!

A reader gave me this idea. Thanks Mark!

Unfortunatly I don't think it will go in the paper. But it should be seen.

Thanks for reading.

The Ward of the State - Again?

This cartoon was originally done last month. I thought that it would not see the light of day. Thanks to Wards continued spotlight, he became a target once again. I think I captured Ward Churchills' likeness pretty good. Oh yeah, what is in the sewer? A chicken? Or perhaps a prairie dog? I am pretty sure its a prairie dog hiding from the mosquitos.
Thanks for reading.

The Shell Game

For this cartoon, I teamed up with Charlie Wrobbel. Please let me/us know any thoughts you have. Feedback is important. We will try to tap into the national market.

Thanks for reading.

Colorado is the Thinnest State, Sorry Mississippi.

This one cracks me up. One things for sure, Colorado is the BEST state to live in.

Thanks for reading.

We should have a study about our studies!

This idea was also presented to me by the boss.

Thanks for reading.

Long Stop Lights are the Worst!

This idea was presented to me by the boss. It's nice to have a boss with a sence of humor. I hate waiting for the light on that hill. It's even worse in the winter when you have a stick.

Thanks for reading.

Other Silo ideas.

A giant Oskar Blues Beer can will be a great landmark. Is it what Longmont wants to be at the south west entrance to town? "Welcome to Longmont, we party!" Anyway... I came up with over 20 other possibilities that the silo building could be turned into. These 10 are the best REJECTED ones.
Thanks for reading.

Nuisance House

This cartoon was presented to me, with the possibility that it would not run. I did a couple of rounds of changes, and I still don't think it will publish. All I know, is that I would hate to be their neighbors. That's a lot of police phone calls.

Thanks for reading.